Obviously, this is not me. You will discover this as you read on.

Let’s begin this post with the statement that “I Do Not Splurge on Myself.” I just don’t.

Designer clothes for the kids – always

Vacations – yes

Nice restaurants – definitely

But, pricey finds for myself (technology gadgets excluded) … doesn’t happen.

However, when I passed the 1 year mark with ACE and had 40 pounds lost because of it, I decided to ditch the warehouse store jeans and buy some real ones. All the rage with the teens at the dance studio and with my super stylish friend, “Mrs. E,” are the Miss Me jeans. Granted, I’m not a teen, but I’ve noticed that they scream Texas fashion and look cute on most regardless of age or shape. However, they are over $100/pair and never go on sale.

Leave it to me to be on Macy’s website looking around and come across a style that’s on clearance. For the low, low price of $86 they could be mine. It’s a bargain, right? I completely justified it in my head and made it ok. The catch – they only had 2 sizes left.

Now, I’m not nearly as cute as my friend, “Mrs. E” and our bodies are completely different shapes, but I thought we might be close to the same size, so I called to ask what she wore. Like a true friend, she told me! It was one of the sizes left in stock!!! Hallelujah!!!

I promptly put them in my basket and hit “purchase” before I changed my mind.

I waited 3 days until they hit my porch. I was so excited, but had all the usual anxiety that happens when you buy something in a size that you think might be too small, but you’re hoping for your self-esteem’s sake that it’s not. You know that feeling?

The jeans were cute as can be. Exactly what I wanted and wouldn’t you know, those 28s pulled right up, buttoned and zipped with ease. Except I realized that they were major low-rise. So, low-rise that part of my crack was still showing. A good inch or more to be quite honest!

I walked shamelessly down the steps to show my ever-supportive husband. Piper was laughing hysterically behind me. I said “Don, look at these jeans.” His response  €“ such a typical male  €“ “You’ll just have to wear different panties.”

“Really. Different panties???” I responded. “This is my crack,” I said as I pointed out the obvious!

If I sat down, I would dare say that the waistband would have been at the top of my thighs. This was something that different panties, no panties, Spanx panties couldn’t help … it didn’t matter. The panties were NOT the issue.

So, needless to say, I took them back to Macy’s. I can not be the only person that has a little “junk in the truck”. What are we to do?

I got to Macy’s and decided that maybe it was just “that pair”. Perhaps it was the fact that they were on clearance that made them so goofy. With that in mind, I grabbed another 2 pairs – each different styles – and headed to the dressing room.

Nope. Visible crack with both pairs.

Back to the rack. Won’t be showin’ no crack.

LOL.

So, I did the walk of shame to the regular jeans department. I made myself feel better by realizing that I could probably buy 3 pairs of jeans for the price I paid for that one.

I was completely frustrated by the process but did find a God-send of a jeans idea. Levi’s has introduced a concept where you pick your “curve ID”. The choices are slight, demi, and bold. Gals like me with a bubble butt, we are “bold”.

Here’s the official definition from Levi’s:

The jean for curvy women with a very defined waist, hip and seat. The Modern Bold Curve honors genuine curves, hitting just below the hip and hugging your waist without gapping or pulling.

That sounds like me, so I grabbed a pair and headed to the fitting room.

Stars and flowers, they were perfect! I mean … P-E-R-F-E-C-T.

They retailed for $78 and were worth every cent.

Next, I grabbed another little gem. These cuties are from Earl Jeans and come in petite length. I’m still not used to buying smaller sizes, so I really didn’t think that these would work, but they, too, are a perfect fit. There was no “curvy or not curvy” – just plain ‘ol size 6P.

I couldn’t find the brand listed online, so I’m not sure if this is a Macy’s store brand or just a smaller independent label. The jeans are great, though and if you are looking for something with the bling of Miss Me, then I recommend these. The cut is very similar (except a slightly higher waist and more booty coverage), and the back pockets are all jeweled up!

The retail price is $54, but Macy’s was offering a sale of $31.99/pair for these. A steal, I tell you!

With summer coming upon me, these 2 new pairs will get me through for a while and now that I’ve found pairs that I like – I might just buy jeans more often. (A friend also recommended LA Idol, so I want to try those as well.)

Do you have a brand/fit that you love? I’d be interested to hear about it. With so many body shapes and sizes, no wonder there are so many choices.